The angel reassured them. “Don’t be afraid!” he said. “I bring you good news that will bring great joy to all people. “  Luke 2:10

“The Gospels list some 125 Christ-issued imperatives.  Of these, 21 urge us to ‘not be afraid’ or ‘not fear’ or ‘have courage’ or ‘take heart’ or ‘be of good cheer.’  The second most common command, to love God and neighbor, appears on only eight occasions.  If quantity is any indicator, Jesus takes our fears seriously.  The one statement He made more than any other was this:  don’t be afraid.”  –Max Lucado

This Christmas season, with its many crazy ups and down, may you live bravely.  The fear-filled cannot love deeply because love is risky.  Take the risks.  If burned, walk away recognizing your bravery and smile.

Merry Christmas from all of us on the Wild Frontier.

I am really embracing this new title for me, Dating Coach. I discovered it on July7 and it really has grown on me. Maybe because I’ve been in youth ministry for 34 years so I’ve seen lots of teens grow into adults and grow into love. Or maybe because this just suits how God created me. It feels like that.

So I’m gathering a bunch of my resources. Why, you ask (or maybe didn’t ask)? I’m not telling yet.

I love this blog from Love and Respect Now. You may be familiar with the marriage ministry of Love and Respect. This is an offshoot for dating, newly married, single, and some newly divorced people. And it is brilliant. Particularly the blog. This is just one sample post.

Can’t you see me saying these words?!!! Well, most of you don’t know me like this but now you have met me sort of.  This is NOT what the “what’s next” is, by the way.  But I do want to be wise like Joy.

“While in bed at night, I reached for the one I love with heart and soul. I looked for him, but he wasn’t there. So I searched through the town for the one I love. I looked on every street, but he wasn’t there. I even asked the guards patrolling the town, ‘Have you seen the one I love so much?’ Right after that, I found him. I held him and would not let go until I had taken him to the home of my mother.” Song of Songs, 3:1-4

I would not let go…

Like Jacob. One night while on his way to reunite with his brother Esau, Jacob was wrestled to the ground. All night he wrestled with this man. Like everything else in Jacob’s life, he went after it, even if he didn’t know who this man was. Daybreak came. And with daybreak came the discovery that he was wrestling with God.

Jacob wrestled with God. Who would dare?! If most Christians realized they were wrestling with God, there reaction would have been, “Oh! I’m sorry, God. Did I hurt You? Let me dust You off. I am so sorry to have done this to You.” Continue reading →

This is such a crazy and wonderful thought.  My mind is whirling at the application of it.

“The glory of the human condition is that we are made in the image of God.  And yet in his ingenious and bewildering design, God saw fit to place the regions for creation and excreting together.  As Saint Augustine famously put it, ‘We are born between feces and urine.’ “  p. 29, Disquiet Time, Jennifer Grant and Cathleen Falsani

Think about that.  How can you not think about that?  Wow.

This is yet another example of the paradox of God.  Reminds me of those popular verses in Ecclesiastes 3:1-8.  You know the ones about for everything there is a season, a time for every activity under heaven.  A time to be born and a time to die; plant and harvest; tear down and build up, grieve and dance, etc.

With everything good there is something bad but they always work together for good.  This is the beauty of our Sovereign God whom we follow throughout no matter what life gives us because He is sovereign overall.  And when it hurts, He draws even closer.  That is His truest character.

Back to that quote.  This is a picture of our very creation.  Our creation that is “beautifully and wonderfully made.”   We are wonderfully and with complexity created then birthed between feces and urine.  Wow.

“While in bed at night, I reached for the one I love with heart and soul. I looked for him, but he wasn’t there. So I searched through the town for the one I love. I looked on every street, but he wasn’t there. I even asked the guards patrolling the town, ‘Have you seen the one I love so much?’ Right after that, I found him. I held him and would not let go until I had taken him to the home of my mother.” Song of Songs, 3:1-4

Living in this brave God-directed life is not unlike the woman Solomon wrote about. I must find Him. The longing to find Him does not let me rest at night or stay comfortable in whatever situation I am in. I know He is the one who will one day send the rains during those drought times (Jeremiah 14:22) of my life. You know what that drought time is for you so you must get up and find Him too. You must get up and find Him. Like me, you must ask those around you, “Where is the One my heart loves?” This is birthed out of nothing else but love—that is all that may be left during some drought times. This is a mature love that takes over mere intellectual or doctrinal understanding. Intellectual or doctrinal understanding was thrown out of my thinking many drought times ago.

A “religion” about Him provides little comfort during these times. I must search out these questions that have no easy answers. Continue reading →

I officially have a new favorite book which I will be recommending and giving away often. It is How to Get a Date Worth Keeping: Be Dating in 6 Months or Your Money Back by Dr. Henry Cloud. I mentioned this back on November 18. I love it.

One reason why is it explains how I ended up with John. I’m glad I did but I never understood why “him?” Now I do. Very interesting.

Another notable quote to talk about.  It is from a Q&A Dr. Henry Cloud was having.

“’Men are so conditional in the way they love. I want to find unconditional love and be accepted for who I am as a person That is like God’s love,’ she said. ‘I think you should focus on teaching men how to love unconditionally.’

“’What is it you want?’ I asked.

“’What do you mean?’

“’I mean, what are you looking for? Do you want to get married? Is that what you want?’

“’Yes, I do. I want a man to love and to share my life with. But he needs to love me as I am, weight and all.’ Continue reading →

I’m available to come and teach at an event for your church or ministry. I’ve been teaching a lot lately on shame, numbing, and hope and bravery—the truth of these go together very well and are freeing. I know a lot about youth ministry and I’m particularly opinionated about church family-based youth ministry. And I make this promise to you, my speaker rider is nothing like this:

Plans for UCLA visit give rare glimpse into Hillary Clinton’s paid speaking career.

Wow. I request a love honorarium, travel expenses and times over food with whomever. And I’m not picky about the temperature of water at the speaking podium.